ACCEPTING THE NEED TO CHANGE IS WHERE PEOPLE GET STUCK
In any continuum of change, there are three broad stages; awareness, acceptance and action. Awareness of the need to change, an acceptance and commitment to that change, and then actions leading to the desired change.
What most people falsely believe is that action is the difficult part. They think the long journey is from acceptance to action, but in fact that is not the case; the long journey is always from awareness to acceptance. Acceptance is where people get stuck in any process of change.
Understanding the ‘awareness-acceptance-action’ change continuum is one thing; executing it is another. What’s the biggest obstacle? The belief that in order to accept something, we (or others) need to like it.
Think about how many things we accept in our daily lives, that we don’t necessarily like. We accept multiple security checks and long lines at the airport, even though we’ve got better things to do. We accept the need to exercise regularly in order to stay healthy, even though we might rather sleep in or watch TV. We accept the need to spend holidays with extended family, even though they may drive us nuts. On and on it goes; countless things we accept, even though we may not like them.
It is this mindset that we need to cultivate in others (and ourselves) to maximize our influence and increase our leadership effectiveness. Why? Because he or she who accepts the fastest wins.
Smart people can usually figure out what actions to take; the trick is to help them get to acceptance, quickly. Almost all of the fear, worry, frustration and exhaustion occur in the space between awareness and acceptance. The smaller we make this space, the more effective everyone can be.
INSPIRATION FROM OTHERS
“If you don’t like something, change it. If you can’t change it, change your attitude.” – Maya Angelou
“If the problem you’re facing can be solved with action, you don’t have a problem.” – Mel Robbins
QUESTIONS TO REFLECT ON
- How much time and energy do you waste in non-acceptance?
- What is something that you don’t like but accept as necessary?
- How can you move to acceptance faster in the future?
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